Corona Haiku XI

Calling hospitals
Until she found him and talked:
Agonizing farewell.

Corona Haiku V

A nurse, exhausted,
Slouched and holding the cold hand
Of a grandmother.

Thanksgiving 2017

The sidewalk receptacle stood undisturbed,

by passersby unperturbed,

in the cold evening.

The old man, face worn, brown coat torn,

pulled, from the trash,

a brown pizza box.

Box that yesterday held a large pizza:

tomato, pepperoni,

triple cheese and anchovy.

Box that yesterday passed round a room

with glee.

No way to un-see, attempt to forget,

pretend not to feel, or try not to cry,

though the old man tonight will not die.

The brown pizza box held a leftover slice.

Box that when opened seemed to ask why,

when gods among men play with dice,

do the poor and the weak pay the price.

Insect

Today
I killed
A cockroach.
A subject we are loathe
To broach:
Is God the sidewalk
Or the shoe?

Is faith in an unseen future
The glue
That binds the suture
Tight,
That joins all things
In futile fight
For survival?

The image, primal,
Of the crushed insect -
I shall remember but soon forget.
We kill the small and worthless
Without regret.

The Morning After

I woke up at 4:00 am today, unable unable to sleep. Rain fell outside. Was God crying? Or urinating on us all? How could a compassionate, just God sanction this election?  Most Christian Evangelicals voted for Trump, a complete betrayal of their religious beliefs. In their hypocritical hearts, they know Trump's religious gestures are mere theater. Never has it been more tempting to boldly proclaim the virtue of atheism.

A panic attack kept me awake. Vaguely, I recall the fear constrict my chest and knew instinctively that it was the same fear Trump's supporters felt. They surrendered to this animalistic drive, irrational by nature, at the polls yesterday. It was an epiphany: understanding this fear was a key to penetrating the dark, unspeakable mystery of our national political climate. How each of us responds to this fear individually will affect the course of our country, and in turn, the world.

I dressed for work as if for a funeral, all in gray - gray suit, gray tie, gray shirt - gray like the cloudy day that was dawning and still I moved about as if in a bad dream, slowly.  To deny reality is human. Uneducated racists do not have a monopoly on denial. But my clock kept ticking. Because I could accept the possibility that I would be late for work, I admitted I was awake. I had lived through what history will record as our worst election for all its resemblance to 1932 Germany.

Stepping outside, the fear subsided but still lingered. It cast a small shadow in me, like the shadow of leaves on pavement after the rain.  What I did with this fear was my own burden. So I secured the fear, until I could regain my reason, by using a talisman.

I dressed in mourning because something died last night, a grand experiment on tolerance unique in history.  But I placed a small, white handkerchief in my breast jacket pocket. The Christians - the authentic ones - have a story about Jesus who survived death and will one day return. Only their hope sustains that story. The thin, white line in my breast pocket was my own talisman of hope. Perhaps America will return from death some day. And perhaps how we vanquish the animal fear will usher the resurrection. But for today I just need to touch the white fabric often, to navigate the sadness until I can again think.

Lebensraum

I gave a homeless man
a calorie bar.

The stars above the seas have wandered far
from days and nights
when men would leave their lands
of burning sands
and fight
for food and home.

Now alone and thin as bone,
the homeless man sits
with cardboard sign,
his face an invisible sign
that we have not come far
from our savage days of need.

The single thing man will not fight
is greed.

Ceiling

Another night

Staring at the ceiling.

Wondering -

There is a world on the other side. 

Footsteps I don't hear but sense.

In silence, on the other side, words.

In silence moans, whimpers.

In silence stares out the window.

Nervous looks I don't see.

Private victories and silent defeats.

People live and die

On the ceiling.

At night, they stare at the ceiling

And wonder -

There is a world on the other side‎.

Work

What you do as work, with your hands,
Matters,
As the sun goes round and round
The sky.

Whether you wash the panes of glass

Of the rich on a ladder,
As the sun goes round and round
The sky.

Whether you mix poisons in glass

In time to be home for dinner,
Or build a bomb for a bigger blast,
And leave church a pardoned sinner.

Whether you bake the bread millions eat

To live,
As the sun goes round and round
The sky.

Whether you plot the crimes you ask
The world forgive,

As the sun goes round and round

The sky.

Whether you know or not,

Workers sit in a faraway land

In a circle working by hand
Making things worth nothing in gold.

Yet the things will still be sold

Amongst each other,

Bringing joy to friend and brother.  

When the sun shall cross the sky no more

You shall be remembered far, far more

By the way you put your hands to work.

And if your fingers knew no dirt,

Pray that they opened many doors.

 

 

Blindness

January brings a fire,
Cold and without ash,
That burns the eyes
And sears the sight.

Blindly

Yet without heed or groping
The people make their way
On concrete streets sloping
Away –

Away, away from alleys,

Those moribund urban valleys,
Where hidden creatures lay.

The ghosts of unknown abuse,

These spirits hide in refuse.
Invisible to the eye,
They stand, swaying, in corners,
While the blind people glide by.

Their shadowy shapes vary –

Women and children who once owned homes.
Now they haunt dark, empty doorways,
In the cold and all alone.

Down comes the snow and turns the world white.

The tracks of these spirits are fast hid from sight.
If a ghost should appear on your way home one night
And ask for a gift to fight hunger and blight,
And your heart can still see though your eyes may be blind,
Remember one day you may too be a ghost –
The blind at the mercy of thieves lose the most.

Independence: A Meditation

We gained our independence from the faraway king,
Only to grow dependent on this new land of dark forests
And mysterious savages.

We gained independence from the wild frontier,
And the fetters of an early death,
Only to grow dependent on television, automobiles, airplanes,
Computers, and other machines of convenience.

We gained independence from God,
Only to grow dependent upon The Next Big Truth.

The myths we celebrate are not our fate;
Independence is merely a date on a calendar,
A folk tale wandered far
From the stare of our impassive future.

America, like Janus, has two faces:
Independence looks to the past;
Dependence looks to the future.

Empires have come and empires have gone.
And after the deeds of history are done
Only the ruins remain and the myths are remembered.

We have too many emails to write,
Too many cupcakes to bite,
Too many flavors to try,
Too many handbags to buy,
Too many bills left to pay,
Or rushed appointments to stay,
Too many miles left to travel,
Or business deals will unravel.

Too many machines of convenience
To remember the birthdays.

Happy Birthday, America!
And as we celebrate your myths,
Perhaps new gods will be born, and walk the land,
Out of the mists, from sea to shining sea,
A new version of the Trinity,
Of the Father, Son and Holy Ghost,
Of Independence, Dependence,
And Interdependence.

And, America, the boon I wish for you the most:
The vision to see as clear as the moon;
Into the mirror of the Next Big Truth -
That you have become the faraway king,
That we are all gone much too soon,
And that kindness is the thing,
Through which empires must pass
For their greatness to last.

Compassion

Every day somewhere in the world
Someone dies who understood
Compassion – a song in the wood
Sung by a bird
Few had heard
Or understood.

If one day the birds were all to die,
The wood would scarce be silent.
Creatures beneath the canopy sky,
Their hunger lifting fitful cries,
Not fit for song,
Or baleful rhyme –

Their alien sounds, in passing time,
Nest in the empty clearing
Of our silent hearts.

Moonwater

On the paths that you may take,
With no choices left to make,
You can always get water from the moon.
So said a father to his son
On a sunny afternoon
In the childhood day of life.

The years brought strife,
And paths to take,
And choices to make.
But still the skies refrained from rain
On the nights the moon hung bright.

Then the son turned man, one evening as he ran,
Turned a corner in the night
And the path became an alley,
A darkened, rustling end.

The rustling in the darkness
Made a sound, a weighing sadness:
You are alone,
Though still surrounded.
Your life is mean,
By lies all bounded.
You are the prey
By demons hounded.

And though the women come and go in the room,
Sipping softly, talking low,
Beneath the candelabra moon,
You cannot move, you are not seen,
Your life a demon’s passing dream.

There is water on the moon, said the son turned man.
This he repeated, like a prayer, like a talisman in sand.
Down fell the water from the moon
Like the rain of glassy night
That washed the sadness from the land.

Not far from the dead end alley,
Where the lamps had pierced the dark,
Lay a quiet, leafy park.
There a fountain played its music
While the birds slept on the branches,
With the water from the moon
Falling lightly on the benches.

And the son turned man that night
Beheld an extraordinary sight:
Figures on the benches sprang
From the bright moonwater rain.
To him they beckoned,
Sit and talk a while with us,
While in the night the fountain sang.

These are the people of the world:
Reading their papers,
Watching the birds,
Some appear dapper,
And others absurd.

In them all moonwaters run,
So the son turned man had learned.
In them all his father’s love,
Like the shining moon,
Had burned.

Descartes Dreams

I have learned
In my 400 years
The truth of what many do fear –
That we all breathe alone.

Reality is undeniably
Individual.

For no one can dream your dreams.
No one can feel your fear,
Or your wounded heart,
Or see through your eyes
The light in the skies
On your last fine day.

And yet I have seen
In my 400 years
A truth proud men won’t hear –
That we cannot live alone.

Human life is, quite reliably,
Tribal.

For a child needs his parents in stages.
Industry fails without wages.
And empires come and go
Only through armies of men
That kings may need though never know.

Now, I look on in sadness
At a history spawned by a madness
That ever I dared to conceive:
I think therefore I am,
Failing in truth to perceive
That the mind needs the help
Of the hand
Of the tender mother.

She showed me the simplest truth:
That we all, every day, need each other.

Mourning in America

Legal rights
Are easily won
At the point of a gun.

But it takes patience
And determination
To win rights
Through agitation.

In some tenuous space
In the public square,
Face to face,
The human in you
Meets the human in me.

When faced with the thugs,
Atlas shrugged
And ran.
So here we stand:
The human in you and the human in me,
Holding up the world for all to see –
We can talk through, not around,
Our existence, with persistence.

Like roses, rights abound.
Pick them, share them.
Listen to the sound
Of the discourse in the public square.

But, oh, how you stare!
No, indeed, that is not our public square,
Where words like bullets wound all who care
To share the shoulder burden of citizenship,

Of the human in you
And the human in me.